Dear Tessa: He Comments on My Friend’s Posts, Not Mine

Crisis:
Dear Tessa, the guy I’m seeing is all over Instagram leaving comments on my friend’s pictures — but he never comments on mine. He’ll like my stuff, but she gets fire emojis and compliments. Am I being paranoid, or is this shady?

— Liked but Not Loved

Oh no, babe, you’re not paranoid, you’re observant. A man who can find the energy to gas up your friend’s selfie but can’t toss a single heart-eye your way is telling on himself loud and clear. That’s not just an oversight, that’s selective effort. And selective effort is a red flag wrapped in Wi-Fi.

Here’s the brutal truth: social media isn’t everything, but it is a reflection of where his attention goes. If he’s publicly thirsting over your friend while giving you the silent treatment online, he’s either trying to stir drama, keep you on edge, or he’s just plain disrespectful. None of those are cute.

The fix? Address it once. “Interesting how my friend’s post deserves three fire emojis but mine gets nothing.” Then watch. If he brushes it off, doubles down, or calls you “crazy” for noticing, congratulations — he’s auditioning for the role of Ex-Boyfriend.

Final Thought: If he can hype up your friend but not you, he’s showing you where his energy is — and it’s not with you.

Disclaimer: Menace Mail is written with equal parts sarcasm, savage honesty, and a little too much iced coffee. These answers are not licensed therapy (shocking, I know), just unfiltered perspective. If it stings, maybe that’s the point. It is pure satire and for entertainment purposes only. The scenarios, “advice,” and commentary are exaggerated, over-the-top, and not meant to be taken literally. If you’re here for actual relationship guidance, you’re in the wrong inbox and on the wrong blog.