Sir, Please, She Doesn’t Want “U Up?” She Wants “I’m Outside”

Let’s talk bare minimum: “u up?” at 1:42 a.m. isn’t charming, it’s predictable. You’re not mysterious, you’re lazy. If you want to stand out, show effort. Because let’s be real: she doesn’t want a late-night question, she wants a late-night answer.

The magic words aren’t “u up?” They’re “I’m outside.” Effort is hot. Showing up is hotter. Stop fishing for half-asleep validation and start proving you can actually back it up.

Tessa’s Final Thought: Real men don’t just text, they pull up.

Disclaimer: This blog is for entertainment only. Tessa is not liable for men getting left on read at 2 a.m., broken egos, or women finally realizing they deserve more than a lowercase text.